Happy Birthday to me!
This morning I woke up to kisses on my neck and cheek. Chris told me to go use the bathroom, then hop right back into bed. I could smell things cooking in the kitchen. I waited in bed and he brought me breakfast - three pancakes shaped in an "I," a heart for "love" and a "U." Awwww. Plus bacon, OJ and two roses.
I love this man.
He's working 10-7 today, so I'm going down to Home Depot to meet him for lunch and spend my gift cards I got for my birthday from my mom, sister and other folks. Then when he gets home, we're going to open up a bottle of champagne and celebrate some more.
I'm probably the only person who was glad to get an AARP membership in the mail. My health insurance sucks big time and the AARP has a medical discount plan with its membership. We intend on using it for doctor and dentist appointments, since I can add Chris to my membership.
Thursday a man from Pease Greeters, Ed Johnson, came to the house to pick up all of my late husband's Marine uniforms. I had three seabags, plus another small bag and box filled with boots and a pair of dress shoes to go with the dress blues. I didn't realize how much there was. He was thrilled to get them to go through and give to Marines who need uniforms but can't afford to buy them. I was just happy they went to a good cause.
After he left, I drove to the cemetery to place a new flag on Chris' grave and a rose on both Chris and his dad's grave. Someone had put a couple of small pumpkins on either side of the gravestone. I actually felt peaceful this year. Last year, I was in Sarasota visiting a friend because I couldn't bear to be home the whole week. Chris' dad died November 5th, Chris the 6th, my birthday is the 9th and we buried Chris on the 10th. But this year, even though I dreaded being home, it wasn't as bad as I thought. Yes, I cried, but it was somehow a cathartic crying.
I went home and Chris took me out for an early birthday dinner, and we just didn't want to be in the house at the time my late husband killed himself in the house. When we got home, we watched some TV and cuddled, then went to sleep.
What they say is true - every day it does get just a little bit better. You never forget, but you do heal a little bit more.